Green Lantern (v2) #206

Green Lantern (v2) #206
"In Deep"
Cover Date: November 1986
Writer: Steve Englehart
Artist: Joe Slaton (Pencils) Mark Farmer (Inks)

Previously...

After the first Crisis, most franchises in the DC universe took an opportunity to try new things out. Superman and Wonder Woman got new origins, Flash got a new protagonist, and Green Lantern...well....

For whatever reason, the people writing Green Lantern decided the transform the book from a book about a (mostly) solo hero working in deep space, to one about an Earth-based team. Why? I have no idea. Anyway, to make it happen, the Guardians of the Universe, who run the Green Lantern Corps, decide that they're going to retire to another dimension, and that individual Green Lanterns are now free to do whatever the fuck they want. Instead of using their rings to crave out empires in space, a bunch of them, led by Hal Jordan, decide to go live in L.A..

More importantly for this issue, though, Arisia, the token plucky teenager, has been ill over the past few issues.

Plot

Hal Jordan and Arisia have fallen down into a mine shaft as the result of last issue's fight with Black Hand. Their rings are also out of power. Jordan gets up and notices something...different about Arisia.

I don't think I like where this is headed.

Arisia kind of freaks out, so Hal helpfully calms her down the only way he knows how:

Awesome. You couldn't destroy Hal Jordan's character any faster if you were trying.

Anyway, the rest of the Green Lanterns are still above ground. They decide to regroup, and some reporter follows them and starts asking questions about how they're going to handle Black Hand. Kilowog, the biggest member of the team, decides to handle it in the most appropriate manner he can think of:

So...we're sure the Green Lanterns are the heroes of this book, right? Anyway, the reporter leaves, and Jon Stewart explains to Kilowog that the beating of reporters is generally looked down in America. The rest of the Green Lanterns disagree.

Back in the mine shaft, Arisia explains that she must have subconsciously used her power ring to age her to adulthood so she could fuck Hal Jordan. Hal seems mildly disturbed by this revelation. She then tries to sell him on the idea that her mind has matured as well, so it would be totally right for them to get it on. Hal essentially accepts this premise, explaining, "I believe your mind matured! Coming to me and admitting your problem proves that!" Yeah, that's ironclad logic there. Hal then tries to get out of the conversation by claiming that he's not ready to love again after his string of ill-fated romances in the past hundred issues or so of this comic.

Black Hand attacks, and the Green Lanterns try to fight him off, only for the villain to start draining the power from their rings, causing the team to immediately run away. The Green Lanterns in this issue could not possibly seem more pathetic.

Back in the mine shaft of forbidden love, Arisia asks about Hal's ex-girlfriends, and we learn that they were, in order, a woman who was occasionally possessed by an alien gem, a woman who lived in the future, and his friend's girlfriend who Hal stole when said friend was in a coma. And then Arisia and Hal get attacked by a mountain lion. Did you know Steve Englehart was generally regarded as a decent writer back in his day? You're not buying it, huh? Hal and Arisia fight off the mountain lion for a bit.

In the meantime, Black Hand is using the Green Lantern power he stole from Hal and Arisia to lift Angels Stadium into the air. Has enough time passed to make a Donny Moore joke? Anyway, the Green Lanterns finally get their shit together and stop him. They then decide to look for Hal and Arisia and...

Hey, don't judge Hal, he held out against Arisia's underage charms for nearly one full issue. What more could be asked of him?

Next Issue:

Hal's Greatest Challenge Yet!

Commentary

Well, this was a thing, then.

I guess Englehart thought to himself, "Well, Hal needs a love interest, and I've got a spare female member of the team, so what if she's 14...?"


Also, you wouldn't think that they'd ever bring up this story again, but Arisia is still an adult, and still alive and kicking in the Green Lantern titles even today, despite the fact that her modern depiction traces from this very issue. It's kind of amazing what sticks and what doesn't. You'd think DC editorial would do everything it could to erase the Hal Jordan's re-enactment of Lolita but no, as far as I know, it's still canon.

Damage Stars: *****