"House of Lies"
Cover Date: September 2004
Writer: Brad Meltzer
Artist: Rags Morales
Previously...
Okay, let's stop dicking around. I've spent the last couple of reviews talking about dinky little retcons in the early-90s Legion, and they were bad, and they caused problems, but still, they were pretty fucking minor. I mean, who really cares if Lightning Lad was really someone else, it doesn't really change the character of earlier issues. But this...well, this is different.
Ir has been the better part of a decade since Identity Crisis came out, and I think it's fair to say that its reputation has not been great. But is that fair?
Now, in the first issue of the miniseries, Sue Dibny, Elongated Man's wife had been killed, and, at her funeral, Elongated Man vowed to take his revenge on Doctor Light, for clearly this heinous act was the work of Megaman.
Okay, not really, Dr. Light is actually just a C-List supervillain. But imagine how much this story would have been if the real villain was Megaman. Just think about it.
Plot
Below the church where Sue's funeral service was held, Green Arrow, Black Canary, Hawkman, the Atom, Zatanna and the Elongated Man are talking about the pros and cons of hunting down Dr. Light. The Wally West Flash and the Kyle Rayner Green Lantern show up, and that gives Green Arrow a chance to explain just what's going on.
So, years and years ago, when the former six characters formed the majority of the Justice League, Sue was spending a pleasant evening on their satellite. Suddenly, Dr. Light showed up and decided to rape her. And he did. Holy fuck, no wonder DC has had trouble attracting new readers. I mean, centering your big summer crossover about rape and lobotomies? Shit, I'm kind of amazed that DC even made to 2011. The Justice League eventually make it back to their satellite and beat the fuck out of Dr. Light, as well they might.
Where was I, oh, yeah, so back in the present, Dr. Light knows his goose is cooked, and so head's off to the super-secret satellite where all of the super-villains hang out. He wants to hire somebody to protect him from the Justice League, despite the fact that all of the super-villains on the satellite have basically made a career out of getting the shit beaten out of them by said Justice League.
The heroes have made it to Roxbury, Massachusetts, the last known whereabouts of Dr. Light. At this point, Meltzer decides to double-down on the horrifying retcons. It turns out that after the Justice League had captured Dr. Light and given him the customary memory wipe, Hawkman pointed out that there was no reason Dr. Light couldn't still try and do something as horrible again. He proposes they alter his personality using Zatanna's powers. They vote on it, and Barry Allen casts the deciding vote in favor of the personality alteration. It turns out that because Zatanna didn't really know what she was doing, the effect was basically to lobotomize Dr. Light. Whoops. Anyway, Dr. Light shows up with Deathstroke as his bodyguard, and the Justice Leaguers prepare to take the pair on...next issue.
Elsewhere, Dr. Midnight is doing an autopsy on Sue Dibny. It turns out that she wasn't murdered by Dr. Light at all. So this was all just a crazy misunderstanding! To Be Continued!
Commentary
Shit, it was as bad as I remembered it. Although, to be fair, the writing and art are both quite technically excellent. I mean, Meltzer knows how to write, and I've always liked Morales' pencils. Still, the fact that two talented guys came up with this just makes the shittiness of the issue even worse. I mean, they could have given us a really good story, but this?
First of all, if you want to use rape as a key plot point in your story, that's fine, but putting in a Super-Hero context? Really? Super-Hero comics are escapism. Rape is...not. That's just an elemental fact.
I don't really understand why you'd want to write a story like this. I guess it did make the Silver Age heroes a bit more 'human' in a sense, but what does that even really get you. These are super-heroes, they're wear brightly colored costumes and punch alien threats that seek to conquer the planet.
Anyway, it's worth noting that this mini-series had longstanding ramifications. It triggered a run of similar stories, like the one in Flash where it was revealed that Barry Allen had gotten Zatanna to miss with the minds of one of his enemies. Even worse, Meltzer, a couple of issues hence, revealed that Batman had got wind of what the rest of the Justice League was up to, and the other Justice Leaguers mind-wiped him too, which set off a whole series of stories where Batman became increasingly paranoid, culminating when he built Brother Eye, leading to even more horrible stories.
Eventually, this story helped lead into Infinite Crisis, which the writers promised would spark a return to a lighter, more fan-friendly DCU, where recurring characters weren't raped and brutally murdered to add shock value to stories.
That didn't quite work out either.
Damage Stars: *****
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